Wish for Thinking.

I wish to be Buddhist/Wiccan Thinker (Intellectual) on Mahakala (Protector's) Way.

I wish to be a Bodhisattva (one who helps to make world better, one who follows the Way to Enlightenment for benefit of all beings) on Diamond Way Buddhism's Level on Thinker's Way.

I feel that even Basic Thinker's Mental Apparatus On Diamond Way Buddhism's Level consists of many very expensive lessons. I do not want to be a parasite, however. I feel that I should be cost-efficient Thinker Aspirant and i Wish for that as well. (I think that Aspirant is Ambitious, Beneficial and Hard Working Person).

... Is it only wishful thinking?